Transition, by Alicia Sainz Arballo

Poetry, chapbook, 48 pages, from Bottlecap Features.

At the age of 62, nearly 25 years after first coming out, and nearly 52 years after knowing she was different, Alicia Sainz Arballo medically transitioned from male to female. She has been writing poetry for years but her newfound joy and challenges as a transitioning woman later in life gave her impetus to chronicle her journey. She had much history to draw from, remembering her first awareness of transness at age 11, watching a commercial for the movie of Christine Jorgensen, to her first haircut, to coming out to family members, and struggling with passing as a woman after living as a male for such a long time. She found her experiences unique and her story worth telling.

While there is joy in living in her authenticity, there has also been much pain. Her struggles with sexual orientation and gender identity, and her inability to always process her struggles in a healthy manner, is also part of her story. There is a vulnerability in taking responsibility for her own lack of awareness and how that effected those closest to her. There is also the focus on navigating through a world completely new to her, seeing it through a new pair of glasses.

This is a story of struggle, accountability, and eventually acceptance. She revels in a commonality shared with other trans folk, especially those who have come out later in life.

Alicia Sainz Arballo is a latinx woman, who medically transitioned at the age of 62 after detransitioning nearly 25 years previous. She’s been a lifelong educator, counselor, teacher, poet, singer and guitarist. She has been writing poetry since high school but felt a desire to publish a small chapbook of her transitioning experience in hopes others would read and identify. She has written and shared her poetry through entities such as the Transempowerment Project and the LGBT Center in Los Angeles as well as shared her story through podcasts such as “Teaching While Queer,” and “Transgender School.” She is married, though separated, and has three grown children. Alicia has a Bachelor of Arts in Music from California State Northridge, and a Master’ s in counseling from Cal Lutheran University. She currently resides in Sherman Oaks, CA.